HAD I KNOWN!
From my understanding, this statement mostly says when one regrets his/her past. HAD I KNOWN! – this is a short story, a piece of advice to Teenagers who believes no one can correct them or rather I will put in this Form ” Those who unbalanced or disarranged their priority” As we all know prioritization is vital.
Read the story below;
HAD I KNOWN!
“Hey, babe!” I say as I hug James, my boyfriend.
“Hey” he replied kissing me passionately. We pull apart and I stare at his handsome face.
“You were amazing last night,” he says and I’m red as a tomato. “You ready?”
“Yeah” I reply sweetly.
He opens his Porsche for me and I hop in heading to school.
My mum was probably watching the whole scene unfold but I don’t care. I’m so in love with James that I don’t care about what anyone thinks. He’s freaking hot and damn, he’s rich, well his parents are. My mum complains about how distracted I am. My grades dropped but I think they are fine (at least average…). I used to be the top in class though but as long as I get promoted I have nothing to worry about.
James on the other hand doesn’t have to bother about stuff like these. His parents are so rich and influential. They make this huge donation to the school year and any teacher would be unlucky to write an F on his report card.
My mum is so worried and shouts all the time trying to convince me to leave James but he’s all in my head. I simply tell her I can’t. She says I’ll get pregnant and drop out of school and blah…blah…blah… As long as I use protection I’m safe, right?
She even went ahead to confront James’ parents and told them to tell their son to stay away from me. It was such a bad day. I had to apologize later but they hated me already. People like these don’t like a dent in their pride and image… So I and my mum aren’t exactly on good terms.
When I get back from school, my mum doesn’t even wait for me to settle down before the usual banter. This time she states her wish as she owns me and it seems she’s been thinking about the matter.
“You are going to break up with this guy, now!” It’s ordered but I don’t like the sound of that.
“Mum, this is my life and I’m going to live it the way I want. Do you have any idea how hard it has been trying to please you and grant your every wish!” I say exasperatedly and she looks surprised. I take it as a cue to go on. “Yeah, it’s been harder than you think because you don’t care about what I think. All you do is mold my life into whatever shape you want and I’m sick of letting you do that to me. I’m sorry your life didn’t go as planned but you have no right to make me achieve your dreams.”
“Pamella, I don’t care what you think about me but here’s what’s about to happen. You’re going to break up with that guy and divert full attention to your studies or I cut you off” she says defiantly.
“Wow! Okay, fine. I think the latter is the best choice. Goodbye, mum!” I reply stepping out of the house.
She doesn’t call me back or anything but I can see the hurt in her eyes. I dial James’ number and I narrate to him all that just happened. He offers to come to pick me up and I agree.
We get to his apartment. It’s so large with an amazing view of the city. He says I can stay with him but he doesn’t look too excited.
I continue with my life as usual except that I now have to look for a way to earn money and pay my fees and for other expenses. The only odd thing is that I feel nauseous mostly in the mornings and occasionally during the day. Maybe, it’s just the feeling of being kicked out of the house, my mum, and everything happening lately. Maybe I’m just taking it all in and letting it affect me.
Back in school, Jane, my best friend since kindergarten notices something suspicious despite I didn’t tell her I was evicted from my house but she’s smart.
“You look like shit,” she says when we’re back in the locker room. “You sick or something?”
“No! Why?” I reply
“Your skin is pale and you’ve lost weight”
“Shit!” I mutter under my breath. ” I didn’t want to tell you but you’re too smart for your age. My mum kicked me out of the house and I moved in with James though I’ve been kinda sick, throwing up and all but I think it’s just nostalgia”
“Wow! I feel like a stranger in your life. When did all these happen? What happened with your mom?”
“Sorry, Jane. It all came so sudden to me too. It happened last week. And with my mom, I don’t understand why she hates James this much. She doesn’t want me to be “distracted” with him but you know I love James and to make things worse my grades dropped.”
“Oh… it’s because of him… I think your mum is right though. Love shouldn’t take from you. Besides, I’ve also noticed this James guy. I think he’s a bad influence. I think you’re just a side chick to him. I told you to be careful and wary of him but you wouldn’t listen. I don’t know if I should tell you this…”
“What? What’s it?” I raise my eyebrows inquisitively and she sighs.
“I saw him making out with Betty in the girl’s room. I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want you to think that I just want you guys to break up or something and that was wrong of me. I’m sorry too. I should have told you earlier as a friend no matter the consequence.”
I feel suddenly nauseous and turn on my heels to the bathroom. I push my way through the girls there and throw up all over the toilet bowl. I hear Jane asking if I’m alright but I’m too busy trying to get myself together. I feel my knees weak but summon the strength to wash my face. My legs give up on me and I fall with a thud on the floor. The last thing I hear is Jane calling my name in panic.
I twitch my eyebrows trying to regain consciousness. A machine beeps beside me and I sit upright too quickly and feel a sharp pain in my head. My eyes fly open and I see Jane and my mum in the room.
I’m in a hospital and all these medical pipes are connected to me.
“Pam, are you okay? Should I get the doctor?” My mom asks.
“No, I’m good”. My voice is husky and I try to remember what brought me here and how but they all come in a blur. “What happened to me?”
“You threw up and fainted in the bathroom” Jane replies.
They exchange glances and Jane stands up to leave. Something is going on.
My mum takes a deep breath and looks sad.
“Pam, there’s something I have to tell you”. My gaze remains steady on her, paying full attention but the next thing that comes out of her mouth makes my heart drop to my stomach.
Did I just imagine that? She must be joking but everything adds up. Nausea, loss of weight…
Oh my God! I’m doomed.
No…No… It’s must be a lie or a joke.
What in the world. I’m just seventeen. I’m not ready to be a mother. I’m still in college. Oh my God! What would my friends say? Different thoughts raced in my mind.
“How do you know that?” I question still hoping it’s not true.
“That’s what the doctor said.” Her voice comes out low.
“You must hate me so much right now.”
“No, I don’t…Yes, I’m angry and so so disappointed in you for being stupid and disobedient but I’m still your mum. That’s why I’m here…” she breaks down in tears and I feel so guilty and disappointed in myself.
“I’m so sorry mum. I should have listened to you. I don’t know what to say right now. I’m such a burden…” Tears cascade down my cheeks. “James, he’s responsible for the baby. Does he know?” I continue
” I called him a couple of hours ago and told him but he’s not picking up my calls anymore. His parents are rich and influential. They’ll get away with this no matter what we do but there’s one thing we know. He’s not going to take responsibility. You should have listened to me. I saw all of these coming”
“I’m sorry ma…” I say
” It’s not all your fault too. I’m sorry for making life difficult for you too. I pushed you to the edge and you fell. I’m sorry dear” We’re both sobbing out aloud now and my mum pulls me into a teddy bear hug and a phrase of regret keeps bumping in my head, “HAD I KNOWN!“